lit – Page 2 – audrey nova di mola : wilds of the deep heart

simplify.

we’re not our skin of grime, we’re not our dread bleak dusty imageless locomotive, we’re all beautiful golden sunflowers inside… -ginsberg

so! much! is! happening! all good things. i love the busy-ness but i also love just climbing a tree and staying up in it for a half hour.. ha! wanted to check in quickly with beautiful things all abound, thank GOD it seems like we’re finally slinking out of winter!

the magic only stops when you say so

compass project is in full force again, with stickers in queens, NYC, montana, baltimore, korea! and more going out soon.. it excites me to no end to see how much people enjoy them.

trying new things! THE WILD PAPERS which has been a beautiful idea in my head for months is coming to life with the sparks of my closest collaborators and i couldn’t be more pumped – or nervous ;) THE WILD PAPERS is my latest project/initiative which is all about reclaiming wildness, the limitless of childhood, and culling memories and dreams. after initial conception and subsequent inspiration from many conversations and question exchanges with close friends, it had its more public start as the queens lit in action workshop at queens council on the arts i did last month (which was amazing! bouncy balls! compass rings! memories exchanged! laughter! writing! sense triggers! BUBBLES!) to pull memories out of my captive audience ;) in myriad fun and strange ways.. and it will debut as a site-specific performance at the lewis h. latimer house on MAY 9! this is a first for me.. hope to see you there!

in general –

feeling so grateful for my community of artists, firestarters & wordsmiths. it doesn’t matter how many times i get on that stage.. i’m always nervous, jittery, excited. because this is what i live for. and i thank god for every listener, spectator, hand shook, smile shared, spark acknowledged, boundary defied, every electric moment of feeling ALIVE.

i am learning, struggling, spreading wings, dreaming bigger and louder everyday. the ego ROAAAARRRRSSS at me but i keep finding ways to keep it quiet. who wants to hear it complaining of failure when there’s so much fun to be had? ;)

audrey empyre

i just applied to be 2015-2018 queens poet laureate.. this is a dream i’ve had since i first discovered the existence of one and met paolo javier, who was so cool and kind to me, in 2011 or 2012. HERE. WE. GO. i am also finalizing the rundown of “art of poetry,” my very own empyre productions episode on QPTV/queens public television! which is another longtime dream i’ve had.. just goes to show – keep doin’ yo’ thang, keep being yourself – as weird, strange, whimsical as you are – because you never know who’s watching.

i am a rough draft

i am a rough draft inDEED. (thank you so much to handan from LPAC and 44rd for the sick tee! i love my queens/LIC family <3 #roughdraftfest!!)

i’ll leave you with this:

i realize now why there is death and life to all things. snow melting and the earth breathing again. i realize now why i had to keep running. why my last love burned my sense of self to the ground. why i had to learn to dance again in the ash. we never want to let go of anything. but the trust that everything has a purpose is what makes the flowers sleep, knowing they will bloom again. i am sharing myself now in a way i only dreamed was possible. i now know why this sufi saying brings tears to my eyes and a ringing to my insides.. “shatter my heart so a new room can be created for a Limitless Love.” blessed, blessed be.

sprung!

COMIN’ UP:

Featured Reader at debut of LIC Reading Series at LIC Bar 4/14/15 [Facebook]

Hosting the No Bullsh%t Hip Hop Showcase at Hail Hail Bar 4/23/15 [Facebook]

Participating artist in Jeanne Van Heeswijk’s “Public Faculty no. 9” at Queens Museum – May 14-17, 2015 [Website]

THE WILD PAPERS site-specific performance debut at Lewis H. Latimer House (museum anarchy!) – 5/9/15 STAY TUNED!

**JUST ANNOUNCED!** Queens Lit Festival produced by Inspired Word NYC & co – Aug 1 & 2, 11am-5pm at LIC Bar. A grassroots celebration of literary arts plus music, open mic, vendors, ALL QUEENS BASED! I’ll be hosting some of the open mic & reppin’ my Nature of the Muse series (Aug 2nd). [More info]

PS:

when my best friend/writer/artist/revolutionary extraordinaire NICK NEON (who JUST launched his incredible website and is ALSO embarking on an exciting journey for his next feature, ultrableu) came back to the states for xmas, we shot this gorgeous dreamy video for the equally gorgeous and dreamy LISA KURNER. please take a look. this song is so special, for so many reasons. it’s my story too.

ten things

wolf rules for life

ten things i’ve learned, realized, affirmed, and opened my heart to so far in 2015:

1. good love is so damn hard to find. cherish it, work on it, honor it. protect it. keep it interesting and honest. give each other space. love each other wholeheartedly. for exactly as you are.

2. honor the cycles in yourself, your mind, your libido, your emotions, your body. no one can be any ONE way, all the time. or even at an even keel all the time. stop punishing yourself for it.

3. we are of a dual nature. especially women. “women who run with the wolves” is changing my life.

“understanding this dual nature in women sometimes causes men, and even women themselves, to close their eyes and hail heaven for help. the paradox of women’s twin nature is that when one side is more cool in feeling tone, the other side is more hot. when one side is more lingering and rich relationally, the other may be somewhat glacial. often one side is more happy and elastic, while the other has a longing for “i know not what.” one may be sunny, while the other is bittersweet and wistful. these “two-women-who-are-one” are separate but conjoined elements which combine in the psyche in thousands of ways.” (estés)

4. everything will terrify you and overwhelm you. it’s all an experience. take what you can from it.

5. don’t try so hard. stop taking everything so seriously. try new things. if they don’t work out, so what? what’s the alternative – staying in limbo? not for you.

something i wrote in high school..

being comfortable

6. silently honor the moments you are given. take a pause. if you feel overwhelmed, just stop. take a breath. call to mind some things to be grateful for.

7. yoga/body movement makes you feel better. always. give yourself the time to express.

8. taking time to make food instead of ordering it. feeling it with your fingers. burning it.. sometimes ;) it’s all part of it.

9. social media eats your brain. so does multitasking. it’s not a skill, it’s a mind-melter. focus-robber. stop trying to do everything. compartmentalize. leave the notifications alone. if you don’t check/answer your email, the world will not explode. if you miss an opportunity, it wasn’t for you anyway.

10. play video games. laugh. do headstands. roll around on the floor. cuddle. dance to a record player. imagine. veer off the path. come back to the path. no matter what.. all roads lead to home.

mystic truths

may you all acknowledge the wildness & beauty in YOU, at THIS very moment,

forget me not.

sparkler

i wrote this for someone very dear to me, in remembrance of someone dear to him. their story, her story, hit me hard. the details. realizing yet again that all we have is this moment.. and everything we leave behind. the impressions we make on the people we love – and even people we’ve never met. sometimes a star is just that bright..

this is for sweet alex, with love to her.. and all those we are left staring at the sky, wishing for.

“life is beautiful, go tell everyone”

this is for you, dear beauty
i’ve never met-
because the wildness makes
us all sisters.
the universe doesn’t always
make it easy but
souls still burn
even in absence. sometimes
even brighter..
never contained. only memories.
only purity. only song. only
golden strands & flecks of
blue. you.
this is for you, beauty.
who had things to do
on the other side of silence,
your path redrawn abruptly-
all of us
lighting candles,
watching for your spark
inside the flame.
the last thing he
said to you was a sweet
promise to keep
“until next time” –
now saved
for the clouds..
a thousand candles,
a jazz band
bumpin’ so fine
you can dance
as long &
as joyfully
as you damn well
please.
& that is what we
will do,
beauty.
we will look at your
smile in photos
& post words you
can’t read & title
as-yet-unimagined artworks
after your mexican
standoff eyes in the
19th century drawing
room of your face.
& we will go on.
all the strange &
simple things-
the dusting of snow,
soggy cereal, the
sighs on the other
end of the phone..
we know you’re still
working, out there.
& we must too.
you are part of the
wild now.
the endless whirling in
our heads when we
try to sleep,
where we go
when we get lost
in brushstrokes,
the feeling that
makes us dance &
dance until we cry
from laughter,
from ache..
how lucky are we
to have seen a
shooting star?
some souls have
forever to make a
move & never do.
others streak across
our sky but once
& we can never
ever
forget.
travel well,
beauty.
we’re curling up inside
the space you left
this winter..
the glow of your
remembrance
will keep us warm.