LIVE THEATRE / Personal Truth + New Names

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hello my friends–

i haven’t written to you since before all of this began. truly hoping that you and your loved ones are okay– that you are finding joy and lightness in this– that you are protecting yourself with love from all the fear-mongering, being led by evolution into alternate and higher states of consciousness and healing.. we are IN THIS, aren’t we? here. we. are. please reach out if you want to chat, zoom, so on and so forth. i am doing my best to be Here, first and foremost for mySelf {self-care is essential and 250% valid– please remember this..}.

most immediately i wanted to share with you– that we are presenting the mystical and ritualistic theatrical offering, “A PASSION” by DZIECI live on YOUTUBE LIVE tonight (april 10) at 8pm as we usually do in person– in time for easter and passover.

working with this company since last year has been transformative and life-changing– and being a direct part of how they have “accepted the conditions” and adapted such a physical play full of presence to the virtual medium we have at our disposal– has been exhausting, revelatory, precious, frustrating, and full of inherent truth.

{edit from the FUTURE, you can watch it HERE!}

“Taking ‘The Passion According to St. Matthew’ as a starting point, Dzieci researched early translations of the text, relying heavily on the Aramaic Pashita, and incorporated Hebraic song and chant and ritual elements of Judaism to craft a work that would appeal to the human spirit in everyone.

This delicate and communal piece was originally crafted with choral singing, dance, and ritual movement. It has now been re-envisioned for another medium. Though separated in body, may we remain together in spirit.”

i have also been directed to Speak Plainly about Extraordinary Things.
to stand more fully in my Truth of Being as messenger, alchemist, bridge-walker, spirit-talker, storyteller-seer.

i shared this last night on instagram {after 4 hours of dzieci rehearsal in the dark on the floor in my bathroom ;) #accepttheconditions}:

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#realism
today during my somatic session i heard my {brilliantly intuitive} practitioner reflect this seemingly innocuous sentence to me: ‘this feels too good, i can’t stay here’ — but without warning, immediately, tears sprang to my eyes, i turned away + my body locked up tight into defensive crunch.
i couldn’t believe how quickly + how deeply the nerve was pressed.
and there it was.
the dichotomy, stark– and i got to be with mySelf, and lead mySelf through it. without forcing, without pushing, without jargoning/analyzing to death inside my mind.
just by Being. With.

it’s difficult for me to face the idea that my time as Wildfire is over. this was the name that resurrected me, that pointed me in direction of my purpose.
but i have lived enough days burning my way through things.
the fire that i feel now is Honed. Gentle. Focused.
the fire, the heat– channeled, directed– into another kind of self-generated alchemical fuel.

i have been given New Names– perhaps as bastian was directed in the neverending story, to give the childlike empress her New Name + recreate fantastica in his own unique way.

the faeries gave me NOVA.🌟
and last night in my dreams, i was given Linnéa,🌼 ringing in my ears as i awoke. subsequently not surprised to understand its link to my beloved linden– grandfather tree– its flower and leaf i have tattooed on my forearm beneath ‘A Prayer To See + Be Seen.’ i have been wild for so long. forceful. erratic. stubborn. cavalier.
but i am not afraid to be gentle.
i am not afraid to be good.
i am not afraid to move with peace, have peace, Be Peace.

may i grow– towards new stars✨ and with deeper roots🌱– as holy New Destinies shape themselves inside me […] 💎

***

this is a Moment to Stand Fully, and Truly As We Are.
surely, the truth of our lives, and the life of humanity Itself, depends on It.
what is the message held in the truth of your life, and are you allowing yourself to express it?
this time is as right and as true as any– in fact, perhaps so much truer.

wishing you and your beloveds safe travels in these strange times.

loving always,

XO

audrey
{NOVA Linnéa}

here also is a new PRAYER POEM i wrote called “the body is a prayer for beginning,” debuted live this past february for borne dance company‘s eating disorder/mental health awareness event :)

embracing self + other: dzieci’s FOOLS MASS begins this wk

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it’s december, friends..!!!

and at a moment in which i am working through much forgiveness towards myself for past actions, compassion for myself and others, seeing and being seen, no matter how painful– there is nothing more honest than donning the grody teeth, sooting yourself up, and embodying a fool in dzieci theatre‘s long-running production of FOOLS MASS. it allows you to look at yourself differently, point blank– and at others, the idea of ‘otherness’ and the judgment and repulsion directed towards those in that category– what we feel is grotesque, crazy, abnormal, be it differently abled people, body types and abilities, mental illness, deformities, the homeless, addicts, outcasts.. and the dark or unruly or nontraditional or seemingly shameful parts of our own selves. there’s a place for everyone in fools mass, because there’s a place for everyone in dzieci– and it’s hugely transformative to partake in. please join us this holiday season, SHOWS START THIS WEEK in bklyn, nyc, queens + upstate <3 you literally won’t forget a dzieci performance. i guarantee this! .. did i mention we are performing at st. john the divine??!! #holyshit #dreamcometrue

more info (including many more testimonials/reflections):
http://dziecitheatre.org/the-work/fools-mass/

quick link to 2019 date listing: HERE

“Fools Mass is such a rich exploration of human nature and our spiritual search. There is the constant flow between control and chaos, aloneness and togetherness, creation and destruction, the absurdly mundane and transcendent simplicity. The search for true contact without an intermediary leads us into a true spiritual connection within and between one another. It’s a rich experience worthy of multiple viewings.” ~ Matthew Purdon ~

“By the end of the Fools Mass, I was in love with every character. I no longer saw their teeth, or the dirt on their faces, or their stooped and spastic forms. I saw only human beings in love with the sacred, in connection with spirit. I saw brothers and sisters. I am still in rapture. It was magnificent, and deeply moving. And I can’t stop thinking about it.” ~ Dave Klaus ~

IN OTHER NEWS:

as i am embarking on my 4th move this year and 8th or 9th move since 2015– i’m honored + excited to have been invited to exhibit new work in The 2020 Southeast Queens Biennial: WRITING HOME, which will be on view in two venues: the york college fine arts gallery AND the miller gallery at JCAL, from mid-february through early april 2020. i’ll share more info as we get closer– i always treasure the opportunity to stretch from page into three dimensions, especially on a subject (HOME) that is so deeply pertinent at this moment. molaundo, my old friend from queens council on the arts– thank you for Seeing me <3

“Statistics document the impressive ethnic and cultural diversity of Queens but, for those who live here, numbers appear hollow and rhetorical. What is it like to live/work/play within culture-fluid communities? How do neighbors communicate without a shared native language? How can one remain true to self, family, ethnicity and fit in out there? The 2020 Southeast Queens Biennial invites artists with a significant connection to Queens to visualize these and other questions that address literacy, identity, and environment.”

AND SPEAKING OF ART:

my wonderland of public programs at socrates sculpture park is in hibernation for the winter BUT our OPEN CALL DEADLINE FOR PROJECTS HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DEC 8! and the theme this year is: MAKING MONUMENTS (!!). more info on the socrates annual fellowship HERE.

ALSO; WHY NOT:

we are nearing the one-year anniversary of my first alchemical theatre work, PROVENANCE, which debuted at the plaxall gallery last december. you can watch the piece in its entirety HERE, or if you need a shot of spirit in these early waking hours, open to this DRUM PRAYER…

it’s also coming to me to work on a new piece:
liar + a truth-teller: a performance/discussion on things we don’t like to talk about.’ more on that soon..

it has been a helluva year from start to finish. i’m always posting reflections, vulnerabilities, news + updates from the road on my INSTAGRAM. don’t forget, folks, that we are nearing the END OF A DECADE. what has happened in your life from 2009 until now? what have you created? what have you kept in? who were you then, who are you now? these questions have prompted rapid change in me in the last few months. looking forward to creating where 2020 will take me..

hope to see you out there– all best + happiest holidays to you + yours

XXOO

a.

infinitely humbled: dzieci’s A PASSION

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after creating my first alchemical theatre work “PROVENANCE” in december it was my goal in 2019 to return to the theatre especially in an intimate, immersive fashion– but this is way, way more than i could have imagined.

i am beyond honored to have joined the extraordinary company DZIECI where the work is The Work and you are not just creating theatre you are facing yourSelf, facing each other, transforming, creating live connection with the divine.

we’ve been experiencing together for weeks and weeks now. this new family, this new organism– culture. more than theatre, it is ritual, it is communion. this show is based on the last events in jesus’ life, his PASSION, told with compassion and sacred songs– for anyone, and everyone. we all switch roles, we are all the narrator reading from the torah, we are all christ. but first and foremost we are our SELVES.

i am so humbled to be working with these adventurous, talented humans who explore daring with such vulnerability and kindness. and so grateful to be offering myself in their latest version of “A PASSION,” a dramatic choral liturgy unbound.

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Whether Christian or Jew or Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, or Zen,
A Passion appeals to the human spirit in everyone
and our essential longing for communion.

2019 DATES:

Palm Sunday, April 14th at 10:30 AM
(as part of the morning service)
Christ Episcopal Church
74 Park Avenue, Glen Ridge, NJ 07028

Holy Tuesday, April 16th at 7:00 PM
The Church of the Redeemer
30-14 Crescent St, Astoria, NY 11102

Maundy Thursday, April 18th at 7:00 PM
Old First Reformed Church
729 Carroll Street @ 7th Ave, Park Slope 11215

Good Friday/Passover, April 19th at 7:30 PM
(light supper at 6:30)
Old Dutch Church
272 Wall Street, Kingston, NY 12401

Easter Vigil/2nd Seder, Saturday, April 20th at 7:00 PM
(reception to follow)
Old Stone House
336 3rd Street @ 5th Avenue, Park Slope 11215

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from the real-time journey on instagram

as a lifelong performer and perpetual striver {ie: harsh critic of myself} — doing work with DZIECI in this context continues my own work– to, as the pastor at the queensbridge center of hope church said in one sermon last year– to deliver myself from performance.

the first morning we offered A PASSION those were the words echoing in my head– we have delivered ourselves from performance. the only thing to offer now is truth.

this play is ritual, this play is real, this play is us authentically as we are in the moment. how can you worry, as an actor, about hitting your notes, nailing your blocking, doing everything ‘right’? it feels so small to think that way. it is not acting. it is BEING.

offering A PASSION in holy spaces and spaces turned holy by the energy of the people, by the energy we bring– it is so much more than YOU, the ego, the ‘I’.

[…]

i will never forget these days.

i formally observed lent for the first time in my life- “jesus emerged from the wilderness prepared to speak for god.”

this week i celebrated 3 years in public programs at my beloved socrates sculpture park, the longest job my wild heart has ever held.

and there is one remaining performance for our passion.

keep living.
KEEP. LIVING.

in your wildest dreams, sometimes, you couldn’t imagine where you’d end up..

#morelife

XO

a.

[UPCOMING] including socrates’ 2019 public programs season announcement and my installation “trusting the inmost angel” soon to come in the lit exhibit’s next show “RITUALS,” june 2019…