where the Journeys will Continue!

hallo friends,

i realize, out of the sheer amount of time i’ve up-kept this website (since my early 20s!), that there are the odd bit of subscribers to this ‘blog’– which is how it began once upon a time. in my olde age i finally figured out how to move this blog to a secondary space and have a static ‘homepage’ type-jam.

and so!

i’m letting you know I’m Still Out Here ;) (and letting myself know, as ever).

after a little over a decade of writing candidly about my life on instagram, i felt the call to stop last month in july 2023. in that space i (very) unexpectedly hand-wrote for 9 days straight what i am now calling the cauldron-book, and which i began transcribing on the computer slowly, slowly.

THE MYTHIC WORKS: i am holding space with folks in a wondrous way– you can find all about that including testimonials/comments from listeners and participants and journeyers, on this website here on the ‘into the wild’ page.

since an australian instagram friend recommended storyteller martin shaw to me in may 2020, which led me almost immediately to find his friend and kindred storyteller, the late great danny deardorff, my life has literally been changed Forever.

i’m having to reconsider and redefine what normal means. what wellness and recovery mean. what it means to make decisions from the heart or the head. this winter 2022 into 2023 alone humbled me beyond compare, and i am still integrating and understanding what that means. what it means for dreams that fall apart in your hands, what it means to be ‘blocked’ from doing something you were/are really trying to do– because of the Something Else that hadn’t yet revealed itself, or the Is-Ness you are still trying to ignore or push past or Transform.

many of you know It’s Been A Ride. it Always has been.

i honestly don’t think i’ll ever go back to posting regularly on this blog– something in me always needs a Different kind of space. i’m so grateful for this archive of my entire performative/artistic-career-thus-far life, while also recognizing that many hugely important parts of it are now going undocumented in most recent time. i feel strongly about holding safe space for the stories i tell and not sharing them on the internet at this time; it opens up a whole lot more questions into threads of ‘promotion,’ sharing my work, ‘just what the fuck i am doing with all of this,’ how something that feels so sacred is at the Center of my life, where i find mySelf now– but that it is also too sacred to lean on constantly, to ‘do all the time,’ to make my sole source of ‘financial resource’— as i type this i realize it Is my central source of Resource. what the stories have given me is invaluable, forever priceless. […]

and the Journeys Continue. the Journeys Continue.

i have begun writing on a substack i dubbed the Angel; for wrestling when i started it last year. after the years of (literal) addiction to the instantaneousness facebook likes and instagram hearts, there’s something weirdly Goodly about writing and not having any trace that readers are seeing it. it takes me back to my beginnings of internet sharing– on kiwibox and my self-HTML’d angelfire website realm of the black queen, or even my xanga […crackedoutkittie lolol]; but the website especially. i had no idea how to track ‘who was seeing it’– there was no option for comments i had HTML’d in (obviously :) err; perhaps just in a ‘guest book’– remember those?!). i just wrote to Write. updated to Update. because i wanted A Space For Myself In The World.

and i guess that’s always an important impetus to follow. <3

above are some of the latest posts on the substack sharing/journaling/writing platform; for anyone subscribed to this blog/website, please feel free to follow me there/subscribe! and/or send me a message with your email if you’d like to be kept updated on my light-touch mailing list. <3

alright friends; a full-ish day today as i sit on the precipice of yet another trip into the wilderness. i hope to continue braiding these wild paths with you, in all the strange, grace-full, and revelatory ways that we Do. i hope to continue honoring all the past selves of mine that are present on this website, and all of their myriad artistries– by honoring my current self and the wily, unique ways she finds herself navigating this life.

always,

audrey.

PS: i realize also a current-feeling collection of links is available at my nifty lil linktree as well ;) as it appears right now, there are rainbows AND sprinkles!